Preventing Derailment

I was recently brought in by one of my organizational clients to work with an individual that is one of their top producers. John (alias) is regarded highly by his boss. He cannot stop praising John for consistently outperforming his performance goals. John has seen his star rise fast. He has been promoted two times in the past two years. He is now in a manager's role. John is seen by his superiors, peers and staff as intelligent, hard driving, and adept at solving problems. What no one saw before John reached his current role as a leader was his inability to adapt his behaviors from an effective "independent producer" to an effective "team producer".

 John has hit a bump in the road. John has not realized that in order to be effective in his new role requires that first he change his mindset and then his behaviors. John had to change and adapt from being:

• Autonomous to using teamwork and collaboration to accomplish results,
• Independent and working alone to working in groups and delegating authority, and
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  Overambitious and prone to anguish under stress to looking out for the welfare of his team and being composed and acting consistently.

Fortunately John's company did not give up on him. They provided John with the opportunity and support so that John had the chance to develop (without the fear that he would lose his job or be considered "undesirable for further advancement") the behaviors he needed in his role as leader.

My next several Blogs will go into further detail about the process of getting back "On Track"

Having a Difficult Conversation - Tips for Effective Leaders

If you need to have a difficult conversation with a staff member follow these steps:

1. Prepare for the discussion,
2. Determine if this is a "development" meeting or a "corrective action" meeting
3. Ask questions - don't jump to conclusions, check your assumptions
4. Ask staff member if they are aware of the situation,
5. Ask their impression of the situation
6. Ask how they think the situation can be resolved
7. Stay on topic...don't "water down" the importance of this conversation
8. Collaborate on the development of an Action Plan
9. Set date for next meeting

"If you start a conversation with the assumption that you are right or that you must win, obviously it is difficult to talk."
Wendell Berry

Having Those Difficult Conversations - You Never Lose When You Face Up to Your Leadership Responsibility

Recently two clients that I’m coaching discussed with me situations that had their leaders addressed the issues and circumstances with them in a timely and honest fashion both individuals would have had a chance to develop and not be left bewildered, and not trusting of their  boss,  co-workers and the organization they work for.
The first case involved my client (I will call her Sue)  discussing with me the possible reasons why she was no longer a team leader.   Sue’s boss removed her of her leadership responsibilities and replaced her with a fellow team member. Her boss gave no reason for this, nor did Sue approach her for answers.  Six months later and close to Sue’s performance review she is wondering what happened, was she being sabotaged by the person who took her place as team leader or was there developmental issues that she needed to work on to be a more effective leader.

The second incident involved a situation where my client’s boss approved her cross-country trip to a suppliers office, only to be told by an administrative assistant to her boss several days before the trip that she was no longer approved to go.  My client approached her boss to find out why she was no longer going. And, all she got was that he did not make the decision, it was his assistant that decides who should go.   My client was left wondering who’s the boss and what is it about me that I can’t meet with suppliers.

Somethings as leaders are hard to address with our followers.  Sometimes we don’t address issues with staff members because we want to be liked.  We think that if we let some things go it will be less harmful than taking them head on.  The need to be liked is a strong one.  Social psychologists believe that there are two powerful motives individuals have at work; to be liked and to get ahead.  However, not addressing issues or decisions with those affected more than likely does more harm to your crediability as a leader, than not doing anything.  Difficult conversations are the most important conversations you can have as a leader.  It is an opportunity to exercise your leadership ability, and with effective interpersonal skills you will always come out ahead.  You never lose when you face up to your responsibilities as a leader.

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Happiness Through Having Meaningful Goals

The goal is to engage in activities that are both personally significant and enjoyable.

BEHAVIORS FOR EFFECTIVE LISTENING

My prior Blog addressed the importance of listening skills in creating and maintaining interpersonal connections. Without effective listening skills you will not be perceived by your associates as an effective leader. If you think that improving your listening skills is worth the effort it will take you to change, follow these suggestions:

• Take an honest critical assessment of your listening behaviors,
• Determine which behaviors you routinely follow and those you could improve,
• Select 2-3 behaviors that you believe could benefit your effectiveness and you are willing to commit to improving, and
• Develop a list of actions that will lead to you achieving your goals.

Remember the best of the best reach that level because they practice the most, are committed to their goals, measure their progress, reassess their situation and adjust their behavior to stay on course.

Must Have Beaviors for Effective Listening

1. Sole attention on speaker
1. no cell phone, computer, text message interruptions
2. clear mind, focus is on speaker, no extraneous thoughts or ideas
3. Listen to speaker – do not be preparing response until speaker has finished
2. Understand what the speaker is saying
1. What are the contextual features of the situation that the speaker is talking about
2. Listen for, or ask Who, What, How, Where, When
3. Clarify your understanding of what the speaker said. Use your own words to tell the speaker what you heard them say – called Paraphrasing. Try, "I heard you say…………"
3. Understand the emotions behind the message.
1. Look for non-verbal cues (eyes, mouth, forehead, hands, posture)
2. Listen for tone, rate and fluctuations in speech
4. Not dominating the conversation. I give others a chance to talk.
5. I add to the conversation. When a person speaks to me I acknowledge respond appropriately to what they said. I do not move on to another topic without finishing current one.
6. I remember important things people have told me.
7. I make appropriate eye contact when conversing.
8. My eye contact is not too intense. I do not stare at the person.
9. I let the other person finish talking and finish their thought. I do not try and guess what the person is going to say next.
10. I do not immediately dismiss other people's suggestions or what they have to say.
11. I do not continually interrupt the other person when they are talking.
12. I am not always argumentative
13. I do not display non-verbal cues that tell the other person that I'm interested in what they have to say.
14. I never act like it is a hardship to see someone. I do not constantly watch the clock while someone is talking.
15. I do not dismiss someone if someone else happens along that has higher status than that person. 

Self Improvement Commitments:
What behaviors would your associates say you routinely exhibit that indicates you are listening effectively?

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What behaviors would your associates say you routinely exhibit that get in your way of listening effectively?

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My Listening Goals:

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Listening Behaviors/Problems I Want to Solve:

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Actions I Will Take, Behaviors I Will Exhibit to Reach My Goals and Solve My Behaviors/Problems

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INTERPERSONAL SKILLS FOR EFFECTIVE PERFORMANCE

EFFECTIVE LISTENING SKILLS

Listening, think about it. It is the first communication skill we learn. Developmentally, we learn to listen, then speak, then read and finally we learn to write. What skill did we spend the most time learning? Most likely you spent more time learning to write then you did on the other skills. And, you probably spent the least amount of time learning to listen. Currently, what communication skill do you spend the most time doing, it's listening. Osborn and Osborn (1994) research indicates that we spend 46% (11 hours) or our day engaged in the communication process, seven of those hours listening (64%).

In spite of the importance of listening in the communication process and in the workplace, many mistakes are made due to "miscommunications". How many times have you said or someone else say to you, "You must not have understood me correctly". Do you agree? Why is this so? It might be because hearing, like the beating of our heart, is routine. Hearing is routine, not listening. We think we are listening, but often we are on autopilot and just hearing words and noise, tuning out the real message. Remember, you probably have spent little time and attention in learning the important skill of listening.

Learning to listen seems boring. Learning how to give a powerful presentation or public speaking is exciting, and nerve racking at the same time. When you are engaged in those activities you have power. People are listening to what you have to say. You have an audience and the ability to influence others. What is the big deal about listening effectively? What do I have to show for being an effective listener?

Being an effective listener does have its rewards. When you actively listen to someone you will be perceived by as valuing and respecting them and that you care. These perceptions are important dynamics in building and maintaining mutual trust and mutual trust is an essential ingredient in being perceived as an effective physician leader.

“One friend, one person who is truly understanding, who takes the trouble to listen to us as we consider a problem, can change our whole outlook on the world."

— Dr. E. H. Mayo

 

Stay tuned, in the next Blog you will receive the keys to active listening

TRUST – THE IMPORTANCE of RESPONSIBILITY

RESPONSIBILITY
Responsibility means to be accountable to someone or something, having the agency to act and make decisions within that realm and the courage to take blame when your behavior does not hold up to the obligations that come with being responsible to someone or something.
Responsibility starts with being accountable and answerable for your behavior. It means you will act in a manner that is congruent with cultural norms and expectations. You will follow through with the obligations you have placed on yourself and those that have been assigned to you as a consequence of your position in life; common examples include being a citizen, daughter, son, father, mother, wife or husband. Daily, the news agencies broadcast stories about people not living up to their responsibilities as parents, husbands or wives. All people mess up and make mistakes. That's a part of everyday life. People who can be trusted take responsibility for their mistakes. They don't blame others or make excuses. When Responsible people mess up, they admit it and do what is necessary to fix it, if at all possible.
When you take on a leadership role, you are accepting responsibility for a span of control and authority over something and usually someone. You may be accepting responsibility for a project, a team, a department, a division, a geographical territory or for the entire organization. In our leadership roles we accept being responsible to the organization, to our superiors and to our patients, clients or customers. However, often overlooked is our responsibility and accountability to those who work for us. An exceptional leader recognizes this responsibility and artfully balances the sometimes contradictory obligations of being responsible to staff, the organization, to superiors, to patients, clients and customers and to one's family.
My prior Blogs on building and maintaining TRUST talked about the importance of being Credible, Respectful and Fair, holding to these three dynamics helps in balancing the intricacies of being Responsible to multiple obligations that are not always in alignment with one another. Another helpful resource is following the practices of a Servant Leader. A Servant Leader is someone who achieves results for their organizations by giving priority attention to the needs of their colleagues and those they serve. Servant-leaders are often seen as humble stewards of their organization's resources (human, financial and physical).

Another phenomenon about leading and being responsible is that you do not always have absolute control over outcomes that you are accountable for. In interviewing a Chief Medical Officer (CMO) for my dissertation I asked him what it felt like being a CMO. His response was, "it's like driving a car without a steering wheel". His words formed an excellent metaphor for what it is like being held accountable and having responsibility in producing outcomes over something that is beyond your total control. For many of us leaders this is not an unusual predicament. It requires us to have TRUST in others that have a bearing on things we are responsible for. It requires us to develop our skills in relationship management, political acumen and interpersonal skills. We must be competent at influencing others that we do not have formal authority over.
I would be interested in hearing your perspective on Trust and Responsibility and suggestions for future topics.