Having Those Difficult Conversations - You Never Lose When You Face Up to Your Leadership Responsibility

Recently two clients that I’m coaching discussed with me situations that had their leaders addressed the issues and circumstances with them in a timely and honest fashion both individuals would have had a chance to develop and not be left bewildered, and not trusting of their  boss,  co-workers and the organization they work for.
The first case involved my client (I will call her Sue)  discussing with me the possible reasons why she was no longer a team leader.   Sue’s boss removed her of her leadership responsibilities and replaced her with a fellow team member. Her boss gave no reason for this, nor did Sue approach her for answers.  Six months later and close to Sue’s performance review she is wondering what happened, was she being sabotaged by the person who took her place as team leader or was there developmental issues that she needed to work on to be a more effective leader.

The second incident involved a situation where my client’s boss approved her cross-country trip to a suppliers office, only to be told by an administrative assistant to her boss several days before the trip that she was no longer approved to go.  My client approached her boss to find out why she was no longer going. And, all she got was that he did not make the decision, it was his assistant that decides who should go.   My client was left wondering who’s the boss and what is it about me that I can’t meet with suppliers.

Somethings as leaders are hard to address with our followers.  Sometimes we don’t address issues with staff members because we want to be liked.  We think that if we let some things go it will be less harmful than taking them head on.  The need to be liked is a strong one.  Social psychologists believe that there are two powerful motives individuals have at work; to be liked and to get ahead.  However, not addressing issues or decisions with those affected more than likely does more harm to your crediability as a leader, than not doing anything.  Difficult conversations are the most important conversations you can have as a leader.  It is an opportunity to exercise your leadership ability, and with effective interpersonal skills you will always come out ahead.  You never lose when you face up to your responsibilities as a leader.

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